.. To taste the sweet, i face the pain ..

Sunday, July 29, 2007

its monday.. so im not really in the best of moods but hey, when am i in a good mood anyway? haha i'm the grouch of the group la.. =)

just had a nice long lunch break.. my usual lunch khaki is down with the flu (at least thats what i tink is the problem) so i spent some alone time.. took a walk down to IKEA and decided to browse around.. haha i'm one who gets carried away at NTUC and Watsons, so IKEA kept me busy for quite a bit.. left with some purchases which would have seen more of the world if they were left at IKEA.. haha, i have soooo many things i've bought in the past, which i planned to put around my room.. but somehow they're all still sitting pretty in the IKEA plastic bags from the day they 'set foot' in my house! Well, one day when i finally HAVE A LIFE, i'm really gonna do up my room as planned! its taken me what, 2 years? ive been doing everything in stages and in like 6 months intervals or something.. first the bed, then the cupoboards, then the curtains.. sigh im only left with the final touch with all my pretty decorative items.. i guess i just need to be home long enough..

weekend zoomed past once again.. dance was.. tiring. i'm walking funny coz every move hurts and i'm so sleep deprived i've mastered the art of sleepin with my eyes open (i wish).. but tis ok, considering how time seems to fly these days, 3 weeks shouldnt be too far away.. i wonder if i'll actually miss it when its over.. i swear, we humans are a funny bunch.. even the most nightmarish parts of our lives will turn to sweet experiences once they're over.. i guess thats the key word, an experience.. and you never know just what it feels like, till you go through it yourself.. If i had not been part of the production, would i have felt a great sense of relief? Or would i look at the dancers in envy? probbaly the latter, since i would've had no idea what they're going through..

Oh well, its not really that bad.. I love odissi and the teacher's amazing and i can only grow with this experience so i'm gonna quit (try to at least) whining and start to view everything under a positive light.. I believe fate has a big part to play in everything, so i'm probably in this for a reason.. Whatever the reason may be, whether i realise it one day or not.. i'm just gonna live and let live and for tomorrow i shall not hold much thought to. I'll just let it.. happen.

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

Friday, July 27, 2007

http://www.portail-basset-hound.com/name/lettre_v_p7.htm

i'm officially a bitch..
haha.. look at the female dog names column and yeah go down alphabetically and guess who's FULL name is also a dog's name?!?!? geeeez and here i thought i had some helluva unique name.. oh well, i'd rather share it with a dog than some pig or something.. and i will kill you if you show me a webpage "A name for your pet pig" with my name in it, i swear i will!
=)
have a good weekend loves!

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

Monday, July 23, 2007

My feet hurt.. My toes are cyring out in pain, thanks to my new white heels which i walked a thousand km in earlier. heh.. My sandflybite from Bintan is still red n ITCHY! My head is kinda heavy coz my blood's confused and is rushing down to my overgrown stomach to digest the lunch i NEVER HAD! ok ok so i ate.. a lil =)

hahahahaha but i'm happyyyyyy!! met prawnboy for lunch who bought me a pretty pink rose with white baby's breath! its gorgeous! *shy smile* we went to IKEA.. coz i'm auditing at cycle and carriage which is just down the road (although i did say i walked a 1000km jus now didn't i).. so funnnnn! walked around for a bit, tryin to find something to keep my bintan seashells in.. but we walked out empty handed la! can u believe it? IKEA actually didnt have wat i was lookin for.. weirdddddddddddddddddd!

Then we had lunch at BK (my suuposed small meal was the one i shared with him *grin*).. dun ask me why BK was chosen over the famous meatballs of IKEA.. i'm not the one who's a fan of it anyway.. they look way too... nevermind =) but haha as usual the boy had me choking between fits of laughter la.. the charades was the bombbbb la! haha sighiee at least i had some afternoon entertainment! which my 'now-dying-toes' are paying heavily for! :(

back to work now, where i'm on *cough-MSN-cough* half the bloody time.. make that all the time, heh. had some pretty interesting conversations and yeahh its quite interesting how we humans work.. whether we admit it or not, we're pretty vengeful people aye.. and that vengeance has brought us where we are today.. some may feign unhappiness, others may genuinely still hurt inside.. and some.. may truly be happy.. well, whatever it is i believe its our choice.. we can choose to either seize the moment and live for the future which we might've just begun to look forward to.. or hold on dear, to the blasted past, looking desperately for a glimmer of hope in the stark reality.. i bet we all get confused from time to time.. but lets not risk something we have.. for something we never did.

Agreed? Come, smile with me now =) have a good evening ya'll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Thank you…
For making me believe again.
For the sparkle in my eyes, as they smile along with me; Genuine this time.
For taking my happiness as your own, even when your’s on the line.
For forgiving me each time I faltered, never doubting my worth even once.
For opening your arms wider each time… to accept me as a whole, my many shortcomings you don’t turn away.
For leading me to places and showing me sights, I’d never ever dreamt of… till today.
For making me laugh till I cry true tears of joy, although I was sad just seconds ago.
For making that extra effort, to come see me, although it’s only 5 minutes I have to spare.
For staying so true and rewarding me with patience, even when silence is all you get in return, coz that’s just you.
For the kind words and sweet everythings you utter so easily, that make my day, even if it doesn’t show.
For wanting the best for me, cos you think that’s all I’m used to… my spoiled and pampered ways never an issue.
For caring so much, my heart skips a beat as I attempt to measure your love, a move so silly you’d laugh.
For everything I can’t put in words, but you do so well in reality… you really make me so happy.

Thank you...

for being you. =)

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

and the weekend (that never really came) is over.. sob!

I've been having a hell busy time.. dance practices every single day, working 7 days a week (yes they've decided to make us slaves, to make every single cent of the increment worth) and basically jus a 'no-life' kind of life..so yes i am offically a social recluse, reject, retard.. watever. boo hoo hoo.

Worked over the weekend, but thank God i had the help of darling shawn.. A BIG BIG THANK YOU TO YOU!!!! he gave up his precious friday and saturday night to help me with my work la.. he typed at his unbelievably top-speed pace, while i dictated and he even helped me to type out this whole summary while i concentrated on something else.. and the boy can really make me laughhhhh!! i had myself a pretty good weekend thanks to him!! seriously shawn, you're the bomb diggity bombest pants! *muackssss* =)

and oh mi god dance practice has been such a killer.. yeah i mean the exercise is great and all that but i havent had time to rest very much.. between my insane workload and my equally psycho dance practice schedule i havent had much time for.. ANYTHING! all those who know me, and you don't need to be my best friend to know this, i'm kinda a party freak.. but yes, i have been given the cold turkey treatment so clubbing is out of the question till the end of August.. Well that isnt really sooooooooooo depressing coz i think i might have clubbed myself out! haha, its about bloody time and clubbing has been the root of all evil for the longest time- a big reason to somethings not working out infact- so i think this crazy lifestyle of mine is actually a blessing in disguise.. So if i do live to find out, i think i might actually have killed the party beast in me.. hands up, all those who think my happy little ending is going to turn out quite the opposite. hah =) no comments ;)

sobbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb! i miss my girlies.. i have been deprived of their love for too longggg.. i love your random "i miss you's" and "i love you's" so keep 'em coming k!! ;-) and of coz you guys know that the feeling is mutual! much much love!

ok this has been a rather pointless post but i just felt like rambling a little before i sleep. Sorry you had to be a at the receiving end! Nighttttttttttttttttttt!

p.s- i love this picture pile so i jus felt like attaching it here. Seriously the water does wonders for me la.. i love.

p.p.s- i'm not talking about iced or hot water just in case you're wondering. Geeez :/

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

i wasn't lying in my last post, was i? Sigh, don't you wish you witnessed it too?

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

*edited. (so many typos eeekss)

oh wow.. feels like a million events have occurred in the week or so that i havent been able to blog..

had myself an awesome holiday which lasted a whole week! hopped from one place to another and enjoyed every single bit of it!!

started out with bintan on Monday.. and seriously bintan was the bomb diggity! absolutely indulged in the abundance of the sun, sand and sea and trust me it was PERFECT! from dragging ourselves out of bed to jog towards the sunrise..

having an ice cold beer in the sweltering afternoon sun while lying on the deck chair, eyes closed but ears open, simply taking in the therapeutic sound of the rhythmic crashing waves.. enjoying an afternoon nap, hearing the active crickets even in broad daylight- a reminder that nature never sleeps..

walking on the soft white sand- toes first..

wading in the crystal clear water- enjoying the initially cold sea water warm up so quickly against my bare skin..

admiring the pretty fish that swam solo- so deft in its way, it disappeared as quickly as it appeared..

freaking out over the jellyfish even though they were oblivious to my existence..

picking sea shells along the way, one for everyone who meant something to me and some for myself- just for keeps =)

taking shots of everything that took our breath away- a desperate move to capture every possible moment.. but so foolish we were to think that any justice could be done, to the splendour nature held before us, by a mere picture..

missing the bus to the local market only to be rewarded by the indescribable setting of the sun.. my-oh-my.. how HE slipped through a tear in the sky into the horizon- where the sea seemed to meet the sky.. how HE disapperead but still left traces of his magnificent worth- illuminating the sky with colours no man can ever paint much less describe..

such simple everyday events, we take for granted but how if we just took 5 mins off our busy day, we could all be left spell bound.. such is nature, so powerful, not even the king of kings can challenge it.. even while it lays dormant.. I'd give anything to be back there, exchange all the money in the world for that peace and tranquility, i experienced in Bintan.. But at least i took back with me, the realisation that anyone could seek solace in the simple things that happen around us.. try i will and try i may.. to close my eyes and remember the sweet surrender and maybe i'll be able to re-live a moment or two.. sigh, i'll put up the pictures.. then maybeeee you'll see what i'm talkin about..

*all dreamy*

SO anyways.. came back on Wed late afternoon and was off to KL the next morning.. even

had the energy to make full use of a ladies night at obar ;)

KL, was another fun-filled trip.. clubbing and shopping ( yay i got me like 6 new dresses n tops or smthing) and eating and yeah pretty much everything a holiday entails! had a few hiccups tho- all of which have been settled and infact taught me some important lessons which i prob never would have learnt on my own.. we bonded with ma gorgeous cousins- much love to the 2 of you for showing us a fantabulous time! and oh yessssssss the suite we stayed in... wowwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! blooooooody awesome i tell you! so not only did we party, but we lived like the rockstars huh lavi *winkkkkk*

yeah so the week that just passed was one of a kind.. and it was leave in lieu of my overtime hours.. so i can safely say i put all those hours i worked till the wee hours of the morning, so exhausted i didnt even have the energy to be depressed or wallow in self-pity, to FULL USE!! hahaha loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

back to work, and all the mundane activities that i left behind while i lived my little dream.. but remember, all it takes is 5 mins.. and trust me that 5 mins i WILL BE taking =) thanks to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu =) * muacksssssssss*

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..