Saturday, March 31, 2007
oh no.. i wanted to get my 8 hours of sleep but for some reason (stress probably) i couldnt seem to sleep past 10am.. bleaughhhh.. so i tossed and turned and then thought i'm better off blogging, hah! oh well, its been a while anyway, so its about time!
i had myself a mad work week, AGAIN! it was really all about work, like it always is, so i don't know why im still not used to it yet. although if i actually get used to it, y'all should be worrying.. that would truly make me a work-a-holic, which contrary to popular belief- DOES NOT DESCRIBE ME AT THIS PRESENT MOMENT! *mumbles angrily* who'd have thought la.. sigh definitely didnt expect my life to turn out this way.. oh well the 27th of each month kinda makes it worth it.. key word being, KINDA.. but aiyah thats wat adult life is about, right.. hate it but cant go back in time, can i? so i'll jus shut up and accept it the way it is. Till the end of the year at least..
I don't know whats wrong with me la. I keep complaining about my job, i already know what it is i want to do (well i have a rough idea la) but i don't seem to do anything to change the way things are. Thats just me la. I recognize the problem, even identify possible ways to rectify the situation but i don't do a god damn thing about it!!!!! i just sit there and wait for things to happen. How la like that, howwwww! aiyah i hate me la *mopes* help me, kay :-)
anywayss i had a good break yesterday.. was convinced to go out (haha yes i needed some convincing surprisingly) and i had a good time just getting high'ish and dancing madly to my tamil songs.. i had more fun laughin like a freak in shah alam though.. about many random things that i'd love to share with you, but for the life of me cannot remember. but was funnnnn, thanks my loveliesss!!
arrrghhh i don't know why they call it a weekend, coz the week never seems to endddddddddddddddddddd *stomps angrily* ok la enough whining, im off to my land of numbers...
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Sunday, March 25, 2007
so this basically sums up my weekend..work. eyebags. work. stress. work. stoned. work. movie- yum. work. china one and cheekys- for a grandtotal of max 20 mins each. work. detox. work. anniversary dinner and PRAYERS- blink blink. work. numbers. work. files. work. fights- arrgh. work. suicide attempts- if only. work. headaches. work. lack of sleep. work. no lunches. work. dance- thank you god for that. work. sense of 'lifeless'ness'. and oh yeah did i mention, work.sigh guys..guess u can see i had a horrid weekend and the week ahead doesnt look too different either. God Bless indeed.. Hope i survive the week.. *bleaugh*"Remember he put the HER in otHER. Lets give him due credit. Its not always her fault."
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Friday, March 23, 2007
Don't say you love me.. when you're whispering those 3 words into someone else's ears.
Don't take me for a fool.. for i am anything, but.
No one's stopping you from searching for greener pastures..
I just beg of you.. to quit stringing me along your journey.
Its hard to believe all you say, when i can see everything- laid out perfectly for me to witness with my own two eyes.
Its even harder, to fend off criticism, when everyone's heard what they have.. that you've been up to no good.
Why lie to me, and dont even bother lying to yourself.. who exactly are you trying to fool anyway?
So we were lovers once, but we're living proof that nothing lasts forever and there's no such thing as i'll always love you.
I'm on my road to recovery now.. please let me be.
True, i might falter every now and then.. but trust me when i say this. You'll miss me when i'm gone.
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Saturday, March 10, 2007
its a hot hot saturday afternoon... and i'm stuck indoors.. working! *mumbles angrily* ok i'm not the kind who jumps at the sight of some bright sunlight so i can go perfect my tan or just lounge by some pool or shit! thats all so.. cliché heyy :) but i just dun appreciate being stuck between four walls when i can be out shopping for a new dress or something *pout* like thats got anything to do with the sun right :)
yeah so anywayss.. yesterday was one kick-ass chill out session at nish's house man.. combined with the fact its literally a stone's throw away, the booze and games and company was just awesomeeeee! all of us were practically rolling in laughter 3/4 of the time, and trust me the high'ness had NOTHING to do with that! haha and thanks to hornan we now know how a peacock and dolphin sounds, and no thanks to ragi for trying to make us believe a dolphin goes peacockkkkkkkkkkkk hahahha mannnnn it was just plain hilarious! and such a good break from our usual clubbing on a friday night.. loved loved loved it!
tonight's gonna be a 'we-have-to-please-everyone' night.. gotta support 2 different events, both of which we WANT to support.. we're a lil caught in the middle but i guess the genuises in the group will just find a way to sort the sticky situation out! lets hope we manage to make both parties happy! haha yes yes such important people we think we are huh.. *blink blink*
gosh was just tokin to shawn d online.. and he was askin me about my love life which has been consistently non-existent for a while now.. he reckons its coz i'm not hangin out at the right places.. but see i'm someone who wants to be found, and not have to find.. i like to leave it to chance, to fate.. like when its meant to be, the right guy will come along.. haha like he'll appear right infront my face with some florescent blinking sign that reads "I'M THE ONE!!"! yeah see thats exactly how i tink it works!! =)
but am i being too complacent? do i actually have to actively search and plant myself at all these events that complement my 'being found' plan.. sigh i really cant seem to bring myself to do that la!! we'll just have to wait and see.. it is a little depressing for sure and i do doubt my self worth at times.. (My girls are so gonna kill me :p ) but lets just hope i'm not as bad as i imagine k.. and that one day, just maybe, i'll chance upon Mr right.. and when i do.. i hope i know! :) haha!
alright my loves i'm off now.. much much loveeeee
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
plans plans plans!! i've got so many of 'em! I'm on leave for the whole first week of July.. am planning a trip to KL and my gorgeous hawainn chica has volunteered [ completely on her accord, i swear i didnt hold a gun to her head ;) ] to plan us the most exciting KL trip ever! hahaha well lavi, i've set the standard for u, haven't i?? i've got faith in you girlfriend!! well i'm jus assumin my girls will also be free!! we love our KL trips so i reckon it won't be hard to convince anyone!! anyone who reads my blog, please feel free to invite yourself.. don't worry we're a little anti-social but we promise to behave on the trip ;-) no seriously it'll be fun guys!! lets all goooooooooo!! *jumps around eagerly then stops coz there already was an earthquake this morning :/*
haha then there's also my london plannn.. and thats hopefully in september.. i've never been a Europe person actually.. call me a freak, but yes, i've turned my parents' invite down so many times to go with them to places like spain, turkey, paris blah blah blah.. yeah just never been a fan of that side of the world.. but i suddenly wanna see london and maybe paris.. jus to check out the life over there.. no museums and the works please.. i'll prob sleep during the day and yeah i'm sure you can figure out the next bit that'll follow ;-) but the london plan is subject to changes, and i'm up for suggestions.. so hit me peopleeee =)
then there's my birthday plan.. yes i'm big on birthdays! love 'em and i love to spoil myself (not that i don't usually) during that period.. last year (as sho loves to remind me) i had celebrated the whole week!! was so fun la.. we clubbed, went to the beach and just.. made me happy.. sigh did i mention i LOVEEEE birthdays! ok correction, MY birthday :) ok now that i've made my point, lets move alonggggg
oh no wait we can't move along.. i was about to mention my birthday plan! *hah* sorry guyss.. ok so i'm plannin to use my mommy's raffles hotel voucher and book a room either on my bday eve or over the weekend.. i shall consider that carefully and update you'll when the important decision has been made =) and its gonna be another week of fun!!! so please, those important to me, please please keep yourselves free k! *muacksss*
okk so like those are jus SOMEE of the upcoming plans.. i'm really lookin forward to my break! i swear workin life is so so badd.. sigh i think i've established that point one too many times before, so i shall spare you'll the same ol' sob story this time 'round.. (to those who know wat im tokin about, i'm having the around and round debate in my head again *meek*)
sigh i've got so much work to do and procrastinating is just gonna give me even worse eyebags and trust me i've got them bad enough.. aight i'm outta hereee, wish me luckkkkkk... and a life *bleaughh*
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Sunday, March 4, 2007
"And the romance of it saturated her..."
Sigh, why can't i be the "her" and when will "it" ever happen to me :-( i want to experience the story-book-romance, i really really do.. Sigh, i guess some of us aren't that lucky huh.. I'll jus be content with what i have.. Nothing.
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
Thursday, March 1, 2007
I'm not a toy, stop playing with me so.I'm only human,my heart is on the line, did you not know?I was easily bought over by your FAKE affection,but i'm stronger than that now.I wish you only knew how i felt,you made a difference, you made me smile.I never really knew what you thought,your actions spoke louder than words.I guess i read it all wrong,and i've only got me to blame.. yes life goes on.I've finally recognized you as a phase; a distraction,thank you, for you've built the bridge from my past to the present.And thats all you are to me now...
The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of..
